I'm lookin' for a character reference on ma resume.I was less concerned about the impulse, and more about the fact that there's a global banana supply database. I caught myself hackin' into the global banana supply database today.Where's a decent poacher when ye need em? I'm a gawd-damn basement dweller with a sun fetish. I've got this weird impulse to bask in the sun now.

Did ye know we're a quantum tunnelin' event away from collapsin' the false vacuum of the universe and ceasin' to exist? Bein' a lemur don't seem so bad now, aye?.But now we're gonna talk a bit about if P = NP, and all the applications it has on yer life. Mind puttin' these in a text, so I can ignore them at ma leisure? Perchin' on the toiler is ma new least favorite thing.But be warned that I'm still plannin' ma revenge, and it will be a sight to behold when I enact it. If ye be insistin' on pesterin' me, ye can stick around. What did ye just do to me? I'll have you know I graduated top of ma class in the Navy Seals, and I have over 300 confirmed.

While ye were shakin' in yer boots at cardboard ghosties, I was checkin' the crypto market. Ye be scared yer way, and I'll be mine.But now that's a thing we can look back on fondly together. Those Koi fish now have 59,000 followers.Gawd, is there any greater achievement of mankind than unlimited free bread? There's nae.Yer children's children will be receivin' glitter bombs when I'm through with ye! I should be doxxin' ye back to the stone age.So yer the daft punk that /b/ witched me, aye? And here I was hopin' I was just trippin' red bulls or something.U wot, mate? Ye sayin' yer the source of ma plight? Are ye just havin' a go at me?.At least ye didn't turn me into a frog.It's one of the boys you cursed! Now you just have to break the news that his 'affliction' is your fault. You look up, and are surprised to see a lemur where you were expecting to see something more human-shaped.Let's go - I'm at the computer just in front of ye. ' I cannae BELIEVE ye beat ma best time! Even as I was tryin' to stop ye! That kind of hackin' demands a pint to celebrate.He congratulates you on your leet hacking skillz, and calls for a truce.

A mysterious message pops-up on your screen, from a hacker called Anon.

But after a few quick searches, you realize you've accidentally hacked into NORAD. You grab a seat at an internet cafe, and start internetting.

You decide to try searching the 'internets' for information on the manimals you cursed.

Anon comes off as a reclusive and cheeky geek who is content with his tendency to spend most of his time online.

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